Saturday, December 25, 2004

HOHOHO!! merry christmas!! :))))) haven't been blogging for years!! cuz i've been out looking for a stupid job. and yes.. i'm working now!! and it sucks.. working at cpf now! wahahaa.. well.. i dun think i'll last long in this job! soon i'll be on my job hunt again!! :(((((
and sorry guys! hahaa.. i know we're supposed to be going sentosa but in the end nothing came thru.. :)) n cuz i'm in the customer service line i'm only free on sunday if we wanna go tanning.. sorry yeah!
this must be the best christmas so far.. eve was spent cooking at Z's place.. had pasta and potato pie! it was really nice. and we din take v long. gd thing the maids helped us with it. ahahhaa.. then we watched vcds and had haagen daaz at 12am! woke up and starting pigging on chips.. christmas greetings from shawn and ben foo from china! ahah.. wj got me perfume, Z got me this necklace w swarovski crystal + some really nice bottles tt spelled my name.. all from europe! and my sis got me a handbag for work.. so sweet of them all.. muackz* regardless of the prez or not.. i love u guys all the same!!
having stupid cramps on christmas day.. slept the day away.. from overexhaustion.. pple. pls tell ur parents to do their ers encashment online or at the atm! do not come down to the cpf board to bother us! hahaa.. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Posted by sil3ntrain at 10:06:00 PM

Thursday, December 09, 2004

feeling numb. maybe tts cuz i've been working practically all night for tt stupid presentation. how can singapore do to improve her competitiveness?! thanks to my jie mei mr BENJAMIN FOO for giving me some ideas. we were criticizing the education sys and what not.. intellectual conversation anytime!! haa.. we're damn alike man.. so cool.. hahaa.
i guess everyone is right about me.. i know wat i need but i dunno what i want.. but then again.. i dun think i want anything.. i dun even know what it's like missing someone now.. or if tts wat i'm feeling.. numb.. devoid of all feelings and emotions.. feel like some empty shell.. this is not me..

where am i..

losing it..

losing myself..

but i dun think i realy give a damn.. sad huh..

Posted by sil3ntrain at 5:19:00 PM

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

jy has gone overseas.. wun be back till like 20+ :( had breakfast at mac then headed to his place to bake our cookies.. made a total mess on purpose.. cuz he wants his maids to do more work instead of sleeping and slacking in their air conditioned rooms! i fried scrambled eggs, luncheon meat and sausages. tt was lunch.. how interesting rite?
shawn is an irritating ass.. he was criticising me(as usual.. he and his foul mouth) throughout dinner. slap* and he totally convinced me i got fungus infection on my face!! so i guess i'm going to see my doc later. just to make sure it's nothing.. :(
went out with yuf n bang yesterday to watch 'saw'. it's a great movie.. go catch it. the truly gory part is only about dr gordon(i think..) sawing off his foot.. i think he died anyway.. it's only till the last part tt u know who exactly is the mastermind behind everything. and it's super cool.. tt psycho is really a smarty arse.. ahhaa.. go watch go watch!!
ok yes.. crapping.. i'm gonna attempt to run again.. hope i wun trip again this time.. yeap!

Posted by sil3ntrain at 11:29:00 AM

Sunday, December 05, 2004

i'm totally shagged.. sleepover at bestie's place was amazing.. but we din have our fashion parade, din have our overnight baking session, din play ps or anything like tt.. all we did was laze around in bed, watch vcd, listen to jay chou over and over again and talk all night.. how nice..
life is kinda unexpected. it's crazy yet lovable. there're things i want but i don't dare to want them.. it's hard and it takes lots of guts.. sigh.. dun suppose u guys know what i'm talking about. ahah!
dun u guys think married life rox? tt kinda stability. tt kinda understanding. just lying next to each other, talking about anything. laughing at each other.. having him watch over u while u sleep, falling asleep in his arms, then waking again in his embrace. ok.. i'm going nuts.. haha! ben said i'm idealistic.. i guess.. :)

let me have the strength and guts to move forward..

Posted by sil3ntrain at 3:40:00 PM

Thursday, December 02, 2004

retail therapy rocks. shopped with eu and mab darling on tues!! bought lotsa stuff.. felt really good. continued shopping on wed with ber and i highlighted mi hair!! it's hm.. i dun really know how to describe the colour but it's like this copper red thing. helped him look for his prom stuff too. zara got nice coats!! got into some awkward situation there.. well.. anyway it's gd to have ber ard even though he always make me feel lousy about myself (cuz he nv ever admit tt i'm quite perfect) ahhaa..

felt overwhelmed when i was watching idols. dunno what got into me. guess it's the tiramisu at tcc, made me feel kinda dizzy.. ahhaa.. i guess cuz i was tired.. haven't been sleeping well.. more like.. haven't been sleeping. anyway.. it got me thinking about all the friends i love ever so dearly.. and i cried while i smsed them, telling them how much i love them.. and i cried somemore when they tell me they love me the same.. went kinda nuts.. i dunno..
sometimes i just need tt someone to be there for me.. someone i can just rely on. i dunno how much i can handle or how much i can take.. and no.. i'm not looking for love.. i dun think i'm capable of handling it. anyway i'm thankful i had a friend like ber.. our relationship is.. Unclassified. have no idea what is it exactly..
funny how sometimes u think u're so strong but actually u're not. how u think tt u can get over anything but u can't. how u think nothing in the world can bother u but it does..

what happened to plan solitude.. been out this whole wk, feeling kinda shagged already.. 1st day this wk i'm having dinner home. home cooked food nv tasted so gd.. another day in town tmr followed by pubbing plus sleepover at my bestie's place. i hope it'll be gd. gonna bake cookies at night, play ps, have our fashion parade whatever.. gonna head down to east coast to watch the sunrise.. i hope we'll survive the night.

life is gd.. or is it really? i have no idea.. got thru the 1st interview.. was quite surprised they actually called me today cuz interviews have yet to end.. hope i'll do fine for the next assessment.. somehow i'm not really excited about this.. i'm not excited about anything.. falling sick again.. maybe i'll be sick tmr.. somehow i'm hoping i will be.. this is sick..

Posted by sil3ntrain at 10:39:00 PM